I am a very fast shower-er. Like, supremely fast. I like to defy expectations by taking as little time to shower as possible. However, the time I lose during showering, I surely make up for during post-shower prep time. It
mostly comes in the form of changing outfits a million, trillion times.

This trend started young: The year was 2007. (<– That’s me in 2007.) I recall going to my first dance at the Teen Center (…) Arch Street. The word on the street was that Saving Jane was going to be playing! Woo! Except, typically, I had no idea who Saving Jane was. Apparently their big hit was “Girl Next Door,” so I spent a good chunk of the afternoon listening/trying to like the song.

I’d showered by about 4 p.m. and was completely ready to go by 8 p.m. Not a quick turnover rate, let me tell you. I spent most of that time trying on, throwing down, then retrying on a selection of outfits I will illustrate for you below. Abercrombie was big. So were polos on polos on polos. (I can still remember the close-lipped braces smile pictures I took of myself on Photobooth. It makes me cringe, but also makes me smile with teeth more…)

That Arch Street was also the first time I witnessed grinding. Or rather, ‘grinding.’ Oh ick. Memories. Still. So. Fresh.

Anyway, nothing’s changed. My room is a complete disaster 95% of the time, with all of my rejected outfits shoved under my desk, on top of chairs, you name it. It’s all because I have too much time!